aRe u a rEal pRogRamMer..?

I know a lot of people saying they are programmers just because they can handle Excel formulas without (too much) hassle.

Others say they are programmers because they modified a form validator script found somewhere in the web and, hey, it worked. For almost a week.

Now I decided to write down 12 rules to determine if you are really a PROgrammer or just another wannabe

1) You are making a living with programming

I don’t want to know how much do you earn, because I know this depends a lot from the Country you live in, but if you are a PROgrammer, then PROgramming is your PROfession and you must make a living out of it.

2) You often fill your spare time programming

A PROgrammer never gets bored when programming, so you shouldn’t be surprised to find yourself testing some useless script just for the sake of doing it.

3) You often stay up to late night just to add “that feature” to your script

A real PROgrammer is never fully statisfied about his scripts, so he keeps adding new features until he’s about to fall asleep

4) You can’t sleep if your script does not work properly and you don’t know why

If a routine does not work and you can’t figure out why, then you cannot eat, you cannot go at the gym, you cannot even sleep before you know what happened

5) You have new ideas about increasing scripts performances in the strangest situations

I have such ideas at the restaurant, at the cinema, and even when I am listening to a friend of mine complaining his girlfriend is probably cheating him. It happened. Seriously. But I did not suggest him to “remove the object to free memory”.

6) You always wonder why the third letter of the alphabet has the same name as a programming language

As far as I know, who developed the alphabet did not know C, so this will probably remain a mistery.

7) Your bookshelf has a pile of books about programming

Who cares for latest Stephen King’s novel when you can read interesting books about programming? Here it is my bookshelf

8) You are really excited when comes out a new language/version

New language/version means new features, new possibilities, new challenges…

9) You are amazed when you look at a software and think about the programming behind it

This happens mostly when playing games… when I played Quake, I wasn’t amazed by the first real 3D first person shooter, but by knowing someone was skilled enough to code a real 3D engine performing enough to handle all gamind dynamics

10) You can’t bring it down you can’t program everything

I mean… wouldn’t it be perfect if you TV remote control had a little console where you can enter something like this:

1 2 3 4	if(current_channel.isBoring() && current_channel.getBetterChannels == null){ playstation.turnOn(); playstation.loadGame("Dead Space"); }

It would be fantastic…

11) Other PROgrammers are your idols

This is very important. If you want to be fan of famous PROgrammer, check this page and be his fan. One day or another, he will publish some exclusive content in it.

12) You did not take this list too seriously

PROgrammers are ironic. If you aren’t ironic, check your configuration file or report it to your customer service